Real You in the Workplace: Act Your Gender

Women in the workplace often try to act like men in order to get ahead. However, this can sometimes backfire and cause more damage than it’s worth. Women just aren’t wired like men. And when women approach others with a male attitude, it can be a turn off.

Instead, I strongly encourage you to be yourself. Don’t put on a male front. We need to be strong and stand up for ourselves, but in the appropriate manner. It’s really the only way that people will take us seriously.

Women also need to remember we are natural networkers. So don’t isolate yourself—even if you are in a position of authority. Ask questions and get involved with mentors and other people in a similar line of work. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. In addition, don’t hesitate to ask questions. And definitely don’t live in a vacuum. It just won’t work.

Navigating new jobs and new personalities

If you’re one of those fortunate people who have found a new job, you’re probably busy learning the ropes and getting to know your new team. Each business and office environment is different. They all come with their own set of quirks and personalities. When starting a new job, it’s often important to understand everyone’s personality and how they interact. This also allows you to figure out who to watch out for…those pesky snarks.

While it may seem difficult to escape their negativity, dealing with snarks is a part of life. Here are a few things that will help you navigate those snark-infested waters.

· Protect your ideas. Whenever possible, avoid the middle man and take your original ideas directly to the boss.

· Don’t share your contacts with people who you suspect might use your relationship for their benefit only.

· Don’t rely on people-pleasers. Their inability to make decisions—especially unpopular decisions—means that you can’t depend on them when times get tough.

· Don’t share confidential information with complainers and whiners.

· Don’t share your dreams with bubble-busters. They’ll only bring you down.

Find the real people in your new environment, and stick with them. Looking for more business advice or snark-busting tips? Sign up for my tip of the week!

What your heroes say about you

Many of us may not take the time to stop and think about what and why we admire our heroes. However, it is important because the qualities we admire in them are often qualities that we aspire to.

When you identify your heroes, you also identify common characteristics they uphold. It’s likely that these characteristics are the reasons you admire them. Think about it; test it out. You’ll discover that it’s true. You share a common value system with your heroes, or they wouldn’t make your list.

Remember, heroes don’t need to be famous. There are countless everyday heroes that come into our lives—friends, relatives, teachers, coaches—even co-workers and bosses. In a sense, the characteristics you admire in these folks are a take away—a bonus. Now, apply what you learn from these individuals to your own life and career. You won’t stop being yourself. Instead, you will move another step closer to discovering the real you. Best of all, uncovering that information can be extremely valuable—both personally and professionally.

Some of my heroes include Gloria Steinem, F. Scott Fitzgerald and my grandmothers.

Who are yours?